The Year of Wandering, The Year of Wondering

It’s December 30th so it’s 2 days to new year.

Maybe if you guys notice, I have a tendency to always call every year a roller-coaster ride. What a boring phrase.

But now that I’ve at least outlived 2014, I guess the year has somehow taught me what a roller-coaster ride really means.

Firstly, it taught me about how it feels to be alone. Like, you realize friends eventually part ways. People change. Their values change. Somehow you can no longer see who’s on your side and who’s not. But family is, surprisingly, is always there through thick and thin.

Secondly, 2014 taught me that God tests us in two different ways: 1) He takes your everything, 2) He gives you everything. This whole year God has given me everything I have been wanting like passion-based job, secure income, and the chances to travel around. But the funny thing I still feel sad all the time (sadness is better accompanied with a job though). He simply tries to tell me that, yeah, everything I have ever wanted, is nothing without a kind of inner peace that originates only from Him.

Thirdly, I understand now what it means to get out of my comfort zone. You know like, letting go of the time freedom and make time for responsibilities just like how adults live; learning how to not being really dependent on people. Those kind of things. They shape me. And I am forever grateful that I walk through those phases this early.

I guess after all that has happened I’m still happy (and capable of making myself happy and comfortable) because this year I do not only wonder, I wander a lot too! These are the places I went to:

New Year in Singapore

March Exchange in Vietnam

Autumn in Korea. Best weather!

And finally, amateurish diving in Bali :p

It is so ungrateful of me, whining and complaining all the time while I have been given chances to wander a lot this year. What’s left to be sad about?

Let’s welcome next year with another plans: Istanbul and New Zealand! ;)

Things I Learn From Fajar Nugros’ 7/24

Don’t mind the product placement

Okay, so now I’m in this usual café I always go to and I just watched Fajar Nugros’ 7/24 because of my friend’s recommendation. This is a good Indonesian comedy-drama film with good message (you know, the good, old, wise message we’ve always known but often forget) and audiences get to see Dian Sastro again after the whole AADC Mini Film thing.

I’m 21 years old, but hey, why not starting to think about marriage thing from now on? So here’s a few things I learn from 7/24:

1) Girls may be selfish, but they have the right to

In this movie, you’ll see Tania (Dian Sastrowardoyo) and her husband Tyo (Lukman Sardi) arguing a lot as married couple. And you know, from audience’s point of view, especially man’s point of view, you’ll see that Tania is a control-freak type of wife who often doesn’t want to be blamed.

As a matter of fact, almost all girls are like that, but they have the right to. Because in typical household, the wife multitasks and pays attention to things that the husband has no time to think about. So, guys, calm your girls when they’re mad. They just need attention.

2) Jealousy is silly, but well.. what isn’t?

The couple in 7/24 movie often feel insecure with other people in their spouse’s life, although they know very well that they love and care about each other so much (I mean, 5 years of marriage and they still very much calling each other everyday?).

So jealousy is silly. But in a relationship, what isn’t? Even the idea of sacrificing your self for people you love can not be accepted by few skeptical people in this world. So the idea of being jealous, as illogical as it is, is not meant to be understood. It is meant to be tolerated.

3) People don’t get mad over one thing, they get mad over a collection of problems

You see, honestly, I didn’t actually get what the root cause of big fight near the end of the movie. Was it the teleconference thing? Was it the parent issue thing? People simply become angry over a complicated situation. And sometimes your spouse is the one left to blame, because they’re the only person you take for granted, whom you think wouldn’t judge you when you show your mad side. Sometimes all it takes are time and forgiveness.

Not trying to be a relationship expert here, but hey, those are my key takeaways. So, has everyone realized now that “the foundation of everything is a good family”? Watch the trailer here.

Selamat Pagi

I have always been a morning person, so a “Selamat Pagi” kind of post should have been done like a long time ago, but well...

Good morning to the serenity of the newly-replaced bed sheets.

Good morning to the sweet chocolate smell of homemade cakes.

Good morning to the infinite possibilities.

Good morning to love and lots of love, be it old or new.

Good morning to the freshly-cut hair.

Good morning to the shuffled playlist of ballad songs.

Good morning to the light headache and the pills that I’ll drink later.

Good morning to last night’s chat history.

Good morning to Instagram, especially Humans of New York feeds.

Good morning to whoever asks me the question “What is your proudest achievement this year?” on ask.fm. I might not answer it wholeheartedly, so here’s my true answer “My proudest achievement this year is not giving up when it comes to figuring out what’s right and what’s true to myself.”

Good morning to my best friends (though I know “best” is too much of a word to be defined) whom somehow I don’t deserve, but yet they are always there.

Good morning to my family, who never stops reminding me to be patient. After hardship comes ease :)

Good morning to Adjustment Journal, the manifesto of my immersed soul.

Good morning the unorganized list that takes a whole day to be organized. I’ll do you today ;)

Sloan and Don :)

Don Keefer: Why are you single? 
Sloan Sabbith: A lot of men are intimidated by my intelligence. 
Don Keefer: No, seriously. 
Sloan Sabbith: Because you never asked me out. 

“2014” Movie

This is not another doomsday movie.

“2014” is an Indonesian drama that centres around political theme. It was supposed to be released in October 2013 to make use of the national election momentum on July 2014. Unfortunately, the release was postponed by the government until after the inauguration of the new president (even in a country where freedom of speech has overwhelmingly existed, such movie is still considered provocative).

“2014" set its time 60 days before election and shows the life of Bagas Notolegowo, a presidential candidate from Nusantara party. His campaign jargon “Jika Saya Tidak Menang, Indonesia Sudah Kalah” kinda portrays him as an antagonist character, but eventually as the plot runs, Bagas Notolegowo seems like the most preferable candidate with his integrity and ‘blusukan’ method, compared to two other candidates (one is very religious and keeps referring to The Prophet, and the other one looks like some corrupted politician).

Without wanting to give any spoiler, I would just say at one point Bagas Notolegowo was framed for a murder and the plot then centres around Ricky, his stubborn son, to play hero and detective, to save his father.

I was lucky to have a chance to watch the movie before the release, together with my Prasetiya Mulya fellows. I was previously worried that “2014" will be a boring show for a bunch of business students who typically care more about setting up a venture than going to the nearest Tempat Pemungutan Suara, but “2014" managed to give a fresh drama with the young stars (there's Maudy Ayunda) and sufficient portion of comedy and fighting scenes between the currently hottest husband and wife in Indonesia’s movie industry (you know who).

Furthermore, what I admire most is the script. The dialog was somehow natural (because up until now there are still many local movies that simply don’t nail something as basic as dialog). There were strong lines like the story of a woman stealing cassava. “2014” clearly portrays the trends happening in our country now: how social media is one of the strongest tools to spread stories; including political stories, and how politicians are even more insecure nowadays with the overwhelming freedom of speech I previously mentioned.

In conclusion, “2014” is a movie with statement, and like director Rahabi Mandra said in yesterday’s discussion, “It is free for the audience to interpret the message. We must not take that right from them”. After all, I hope yesterday’s show encouraged my fellows to take some times to think of what they could do for this country, or at least tell their family to watch this entertaining movie later this year.

The Reason Why I Moved Out

It takes quite a confidence to write this post, because it requires me to cultivate my deepest aspiration, ambition, and desire to finally tell people the reason why I moved from my hot, small town in Kalimantan to the capital city. People may have figured out the same reason that applies to anyone doing the same thing: 1) to get bigger opportunity, 2) to get better education, and so on.

But there is always a personal reason for each person. This morning I feel like sharing it on this blog: not just my reason to move out, but also why I choose Jakarta among other cities like Bandung or Jogjakarta which are quite popular destinations among my high school friends.

1) I Need Someone to Talk To

What? So am I saying that no one’s talking to me in Pontianak? Not exactly. In fact, I had several best friends that really understand me. They would forever be my like-minded guys whom I would always turn to.

The problem is, these like-minded guys are very small in numbers. Since high school I have been developing high interest to movies and books and recent issues. Unfortunately, only few people share similar interest and they are mostly my best friends from debating club and also best friends whom I coincidentally encounter.

Befriending them and discussing and sharing things with them are heaven for me. But eventually we will part ways and they will move out. What’s in it for me if I stay in my hometown? There is a very slight chance I am going to meet this kind of like-minded guys again.

That’s why I moved to Jakarta at the first place, to forge new friendships with like-minded guys which numbers are surely bigger here in Jakarta, compared to Pontianak where the cinema only plays blockbuster movies and the bookstore does not sell English books.

2) I Want Freedom

Oh my dear, freedom is sweet. And I’m not talking about the freedom of living far from your parents and having no one to tell you what to do. It’s about the freedom of choice. And we get that freedom of choice from the unlimited choices available.

Back in my hometown, the options were very limited, like the kind of competitions you can join, the kind of clubs or organizations you can participate or volunteer in, the kind of courses you can take, and the kind of weekend events you can attend. Humans love freedom. And freedom is not just about the absence of rule, it is also about the presence of options.

If I stay in my hometown, I would forever wonder what it would be like to take that short Joko Anwar’s screenwriting course and to visit at exhibition on Sunday (you see the small-town-girl side of me now, eh?).

And what is life without diverse experiences?

3) It Is Never About the Money

My Dad once told me I should just work in some banks in my hometown because ‘the salary would be just the same and the work-life balance is much better’. I guess I should clarify to my Dad over and over again that it is never about the money. You know that the colony years ago seek for Gold, Gospel, and Glory. And the last word is what I always aspire: Glory.

Now you must be thinking I’m some ambitious bitch, but my point is, doing things in a big city will generally create more impact because of the wide exposure and because people more understand what exactly you are doing (even though I still haven’t really figured out the ‘thing’ I want to do).

Now my Mom also once wondered why I choose Jakarta over other big cities, when clearly Big J has worse pollution and traffic jam and travel distance and stuffs.

My only thought back then was: “Why not having it all or nothing?”

Maleficent

I straightly went to cinema yesterday afternoon when I saw in the newspaper that there will be a MALEFICENT midnight show that night. We all went to watch it, my family. My sister could not wait to see her beloved Sleeping Beauty.

What she did not realize is that MALEFICENT is a movie about Maleficent, not Aurora. Turns out Maleficent is a Disney-given name to the bad witch who cursed Aurora to sleep. Disney (again) tries to extend a classic by adding never-before-known back stories.

MALEFICENT starts by revealing to us a series of events far before the birth of Aurora. These very much explain why the bad fairy curses Aurora at the first place. A little twist may be interesting (SPOILER ALERT!): it wasn’t Prince Philip who gave her the famous true love’s kiss.

MALEFICENT reminded me of FROZEN, big time. Not that it has many ice on it, but because Disney is trying to convey a similar idea to girls:

1. There is no such thing as LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT

1. TRUE LOVE does not always mean romantic love

1. It may not be relevant, but still, DON’T BE NAIVE. A villain does not always appear to be a villain.

1. Don't trust an ambitious jerk (or any guy, at all)

As long as it’s Jolie, it sells

As a feminist, I can’t be happier that Disney finally understands that girls have to come to their sense: a prince isn’t everything, romance isn’t everything. And a person is not either black or white. It may seem like Disney is trying too hard to fit the classics into today’s modern world, but don’t we all love some twists?

2014, as I plan it

Heyho here comes the 4th day of 2014 and I'm going to give myself the most realistic resolution I have ever made since last year I only did 2/5 of my resolutions.

 I read an article somewhere, suggesting we should simply make a "one-word" resolution this year to simplify everything. So I don't need to think too far to decide my one-word. It is MINGLE.

I feel like most of my problems in 2013 came from the lack of "mingling" skill. I really should sharpen my extroversion side today, especially since the world is created for extroverts (read Susan Cain's "Quiet" to understand this). I don't want to be trapped in this side if it means less opportunities. Somehow you should deny your own nature for the greater good.

On the other side, I realize I should really take care of my health. I have had a very bad stomach infection and maag last year and my plans were ruined, completely ruined. They say health is expensive. Oh yeah it is especially when you should have a 4-days bed rest which is both torturing and boooriiing.

And last but not least, in order to proceed smoothly this year, I should just remember that ACTION EXPRESSES PRIORITIES. No more confusion of who I am, what I love. Everytime I feel confused I should just look into how I act. XOXO