Quick ranting

I sometimes can’t sleep at night and I feel unreal. Everything that I’ve been through, they don't feel like reality. I sometimes still see myself as a college student, walking down the campus hall. And then there will be flashing memories of me working as an editor. Riding Bajaj day-by-day to the office, doing coverage. It was just a year ago but it feels so far now, even further than the image of me as a college student.

I think my life changes too fast. Not that I don’t like it. I like it that I get to experience many things, places, roles with different people. But I’m afraid somehow along the way I lose myself. I want to have something to hold on to — a constant, just so I feel real again, just so I believe that I have always been myself, even in different circumstances.

Have you ever felt this way? Like having flashing memories of your life’s fragments, and suddenly feeling numb? I remember being passionate about my works, or being melancholy at night, but I feel like those versions of me are not me. They are separate entities in another dimension. And the me me, who is now writing this, is a completely different person.

Tell me what you think.